Who’s your boss?

Sep 2, 2011 | |

Love him, hate her...its a never ending saga.
Find out who they are.

The Robot- Empty desk with no family picture.

What they do:
All business, all the time: That’s The Robot. We’re not saying she’s not human, but we’ve definitely got our doubts on the matter sometimes. The sworn enemy of fun, levity, and emotion, The Robot would rather you just get to work. At all times. While it can be nice to have someone driving you to do your best, it would be nice to feel a little bit of emotional connection from time to time, right?

How to make her love you:
It may not sound like a lot of fun, but you’ll probably have to conceal your own feelings and buckle down to The Robot’s schedule. On the up side, she can teach you discipline and efficiency. Try making allies of your coworkers. They’re probably as frustrated as you are! Inside jokes and friendly chit-chat can make the day seem brighter.

The Softy- they give second chances.

What they do:
They think they’re making things easier on their employees, but in the long run The Softy’s kid-glove approach to management just makes it harder for great workers to succeed and easier for slackers to stick around. Being a boss involves making difficult decisions sometimes, especially when it comes to employees, but The Softy doesn’t seem to realize this.

How to make him love you:
The worst thing to do is hurt The Softy’s feelings, so try changing things up by commending them on his toughest calls, however rare. A little positive reinforcement can go a long way when The Softy learns that being the bad cop doesn’t have to be the worst job in the world.

The Weasel- Empty promises
What they do:
Promising one thing but delivering another, The Weasel will say anything — and we do mean anything — to get what she wants out of you. A raise? A promotion? Some time off? Sure, you’ll get what you’ve been dreaming about eventually if you take on extra work or a hellish new project. Or so she says, but we wouldn’t recommend holding your breath for The Weasel to actually deliver. Why should she? You’re already doing the extra work for free.

How to make her love you:
Completing all the grunt work will get you great distances with The Weasel, but just remember to trust nothing The Weasel says, ever. Or, at very least, get it in writing and double-check with whomever The Weasel answers to in upper management. A paper trail will be your best defense against lies and false promises. Maybe you’ll actually get that promotion!

The Mystery- Closed doors, Out Of Office messages.

What they do: 
Who knows? The Mystery is an expert at the arts of subterfuge, denial, and … whatever it is he does. Either he’s on a business trip or in a locked-door meeting or plotting world domination all day or … something. Whatever it is, you’re left to your own devices to figure things out, minus any guidance at all. Too bad you’ll still be on the hook if things go wrong. The Mystery will be gone when it comes down to it.

How to make him love you: 
Wait it out and give him space. If you stay patient (and we mean really patient) you may be able, like a persevering biologist in the jungle observing shy animals, to learn a little bit more about The Mystery’s habits.

The Viper- Backhanded compliments, fake smiles.

What they do:
Does The Viper wake up on the wrong side of the bed every single morning? It sure seems like it. From snippy comments about personal matters (“Are you pregnant? Oh, it just seemed like you were gaining weight.”) to undermining your efforts at work (“So you’re just learning Excel, right?”), The Viper has a real talent for making you feel bad about yourself. No matter how thick your skin is, it’s hard not to let her get to you.

How to make her love you:
We’re not actually certain that the Viper is capable of loving an employee, so it’s probably best to just stay a good distance away from her. Keep feelings to yourself, and share as little information about your life as possible, all the while being extremely pleasant. The Viper can’t hurt you if she doesn’t know where you’re sensitive.

Part 2 of Who's your boss coming next!

(Pic Courtesy: google images. Article source)

1 comments:

Harriet said...

This made me laugh! I've worked for a robot and a softy, and I would much rather work for a robot, cos at least you know what you have to do and that it will get done!