It seems almost yesterday I was writing my New Years Resolution and today its already been 6 months.
Hows your new years resolution going so far? I have been going through my list and here are few ways to make sure you end 2019 strong.
5 ways to get it done:
Break the goal into a small task- The one you can get done everyday and doesn’t take away a chunk of your life. That allows you to still keep it than abandoning the goal.
Remember the why’s- Hey, every goal starts because we want something out of it. So yes, remember why you wanted in the first place. Was it a lifestyle change, getting off medication, feeling good about yourself or being financially secure. Write down the why and go through it everyday. This can be part of your affirmations, your vision board or a sticky note in your car.
Do it everyday- Turn it into a habit and reward yourself when done (when done for 15 days straight). The Cue, trigger and reward helps. And do it for 66 days straight.
Don’t be over ambitious- Your goal should be something you can do with a little effort. A lofty goal can also mean you have something in mind that you dont have the skills to achieve yet. These are the tricky ones, because once you fail at it, you won’t go back to it. Setting up goals is a science and an art, just not words that trickle down in the paper.
Look at it everyday- yes, keep it in mind and give it its due time. Some do better sharing it with friends, some like it to keep it to themselves for the big reveal. Whatever is your style, figure it out and then keep doing it. Celebrate smaller goals and keep your eyes on the big one.
There’s still 6 more months to go, enough time to get things done. So, don’t give up yet but follow your heart and work hard.
“Fear doesn't go away. The warrior and the artist live by the same code of necessity, which dictates that the battle must be fought anew every day.”
― Steven Pressfield, The War of Art
We are who we are and yet we sacrifice ourselves to win accolades and approvals from others so often. We struggle to portray us in the truest form of who we are.
We give up and choose not to fight. “Resistance” as Pressfield calls in his book “War of Art” is nothing but the fear that keeps us from doing the work we want to. You suffer resistance only for the things that mean most to you and are scared to commit.
To commit and get rid of the “Resistance”, you have to be there to practice your art, work, job anything you want to be cent percent focussed on. Which can only mean that you have to change the way you think and sometimes just be there even when you are scared.
And more than 90% fail to do the simple act of showing up and regret it.
The 5 second rule of Mel Robbins talks about getting rid of the habit of not showing up by just counting till 5 and just doing it. Don’t give yourself the time to think.
Re-wiring your brain and how you go about it can be done multiple ways- your way that you can discover for yourself or following the various school of thoughts.
One way can be of Dr. Cathy Coulatt, who in an interview talks about the steps required:
Trust your subconscious
Find more details and applaud it before you judge it
Set the intention and make a promise (to ensure subconscious doesn’t work against it)
Get examples- where you see similar people like yourself take the journey you want to take and be sucessful.
Solidify and affirm- on your promise to yourself and your new belief.
This is life long commitment, it not about fake it till you make it scenario. You confirm and affirm everyday and show up. You can be afraid and yet show up. You can be very sure that it wont work out and yet show up. You can fail and yet know you are so sure of it that you still keep on doing it. Show up.
You and me, can be afraid to take that leap , to let ourselves wander to the what-if land, lack the courage to do the work we are meant to do and yet feel that uneasiness of something that we are supposed to do.
So, stop doubting or doubt yourself so you prepare more and get up and get on with it. It cant be more different than what its now because no ones knows yet what you want to be.
Change the way you think, the actions you take everyday and the accept that the struggle is real to be inspired consistently. Show up and act on it and thats what we can control and do everyday.
Improving by 1 percent everyday sometimes it isn’t even noticeable- but it can be far more meaningful, specially in the long run. James clear, Atomic Habits (p.15)
We are the product of our habits. We are who we are.
Trying to change our life one glorious morning might work only if you are buzzing with motivation, for how long might be the question.
Instead of one big change like going vegan overnight, we can start with small ones that doesn’t take a lot of effort but makes you feel good. Stacking up those small changes can slowly bring in the change you have been looking for.
Here are 5 small changes I am trying out for Feb:
1. Use Less Plastic- I haven’t banned it overnight because it took me time to realise how much of it I was really using. In 2018, I started a new habit of putting all my plastics in a bin after I had done using them- like shampoo bottles, ketchup bottles, grocery packagings etc. Plastics just wasn’t the Tupperware in my kitchen, turns out it spread in every corner of my house. It took me time to figure this out as bin after bin filled up rather quickly.
Last week, I went to Ikea and got few glass storage containers (the ones I use to stash leftovers in the refrigerators) and got lunch box too. I decided in carrying a little heavier lunch box because I was trying to reduce the plastic consumption for my family.
Scientific studies mention that in the short term; society needs to significantly curtail unnecessary single-use plastic items such as water bottles, plastic shopping bags, straws and utensils.
Its a well known fact that when we challenge ourselves with something that is manageable and yet a little difficult, we will keep at it. Swapping out a few containers to start with is a no brainer, the impact is the feel good factor. Slowly getting rid of as much as possible will be part of the process for the next 6 months.
2. Eating More Vegies- As a kid our plates were literally filled up two thirds with it and it was non negotiable. Growing up as life got busier and fast food became easily accessible, food habits changed. I still enjoy veggies but sometimes when theres only half an hour to get dinner on table, I reach out for time tested egg curry or grilled chicken with rice and lentil. Sometimes that leaves our plates without vegies. As a mom to a four year old I want him to know vegetables are as precious as the egg he wants at every meal. So, most of the meals now have to include veggies in some format format.
Researchers say- A diet rich in vegetables and fruits can lower blood pressure, reduce the risk of heart disease and stroke, prevent some types of cancer, lower risk of eye and digestive problems, and have a positive effect upon blood sugar, which can help keep appetite in check.
For me, its just being more conscious, plan a little bit when I do the grocery because I want veggies that I can quickly toss as a salad or put in the oven. I even tried 15 days going vegetarian in January. I was almost okay with it, the only problem was if I had guests, I wasn’t sure what they would like.
3. Walking - I have had love hate relationship with exercise but have always enjoyed walking. So a walk after dinner or after I get back from work is a simple routine I truly enjoy. Not only does it destress me, the best of my ideas come from when I walk it definitely clears my mind.
Walking at least 30 minutes a day, five days a week can reduce your risk for coronary heart disease by about 19 percent.
Doing something small that doesn’t need a lot of mental push for me is a winner that can lead to spending more time walking or thinking of healthy diet after I get home form walking because I feel refreshed and good. With a refreshed mind I tend to make better decisions than stressed out days, where I just want to order in because I am already exhausted.
4. Listening to Something Positive Every Morning- One of my friends recently watched my last Youtube video and mentioned that I must read lot of self help books. That got me thinking- what is self help books. While the category seems very clear if you still go to book shops, anything that helps you really can be considered self help books. So, what category do I really choose most of my books from? I don’t have a pattern (or may be I do), though honestly I mostly read non-fiction now, a clear deviation from my choice of books 10 years ago.
So, this month I bought books as usual, however every morning I prefer listening to something positive.than reading It mostly means something on Youtube or a podcast. It does give me boost for the day and start my day with a fresh mind. But more than that I glide through negative moments much more easily, I am much more forgiving and hopeful and end up working on my dream projects which otherwise in a lot of cases have got sidelined as a personal trend.
Being positive or inspired isn't always about the last book you read, its about the mindset that you are trying to build.
I read about neuroplasticity few years ago and since then some things have stayed with me. And I know it works for me, if I can be consistent on hearing the positive thoughts. You are what you think isn’t just a proverb anymore.
With every repetition of a thought or emotion, we reinforce a neural pathway - and with each new thought, we begin to create a new way of being. These small changes, frequently enough repeated, lead to changes in how our brains work.
5. Start Something New- I always find starting something small which is part of my dreams, happiness, plans gives me that extra little boost that I might need on my regular days. Something to keep me excited and looking forward to even during the busy weekdays. For a lot of people could be , going back home and watching the next episode in Netflix.
For me this could be writing my blog consistently again, or trying out something new like joining a gym. It truly makes me happy from within that even lasts longer than going on a shopping trip.
Something as simple as gardening (start with one plant), reading books, planning for a new travel destination for June could be a starting point. Our brain likes novelty and doing something you look forward to could also get you one step closer to your actual goal.
If you have a life you want mapped out for you, instead of thinking too much about it, may be take the simplest of goals and break it down further and start doing something really small. You don’t need to buy glass containers but may be take your first art class that happens round the corner.
Everyone thinks of changing others, but no one thinks of changing themselves- Leo Tolstoy
Here are 10 shifts to try this year and like they say you can't have something new by repeating the same old things. So, what do you say- is this the year for you to really change? You can check the video directly here
Be Comfortable Being You- This year should be about you and you need it to embrace it. This means it comes with both the positives and the negatives that we carry with us in 2019. If you are someone who struggled in 2018 professionally or emotionally, accepting it is okay instead d denying the struggles. The struggles make us who we are. This year is about believing in us even when others don’t. I found this short video of one of the fastest growing You Tubers about her struggle and how she kept at it even when others around her didn’t quiet believe in her.
Creating the Right Environment- When we create goals and start working towards them, the main objective is to be able to sustain that.
Environment both physical and mental have big roles to play. Lets talk about physical space first- you want to ensure the place your spend your maximum time to be comfortable, connected to and secure. If thats your workspace you can bring in items to give that sense of belonging to your desk. Simple items like motivational quotes, pictures, books and even artificial desk plants can make the space feel yours. Similarly, your home should be the oasis, because thats where we reset ourselves and take tomorrow head on. The other important part is of course the mental space. To make change sustainable you have to ensure that mentally you are inspired, motivated and can handle yourself. It can definitely be a herculean task to be positive always, however they are podcasts, youtube videos, books etc which can help you learn the tricks or maintain that vibe for longer period of time. We also have to acknowledge that no one can stay positive month after month. Everyone has downtimes and when you do, just pick yourself up as soon as you can and get moving.
Growth Mindset- As opposed to the fixed mindset where nothing will and can change and you don’t want to fall in to this category where you think everything is stagnant.People with growth mindset on the other hand will ensure that evolving is part of their routine, they will invest their time and money and in learning and growing. To be able to imagine yourself in a place you would like to be needs to have a growth mindset- because these are the people who believe they can do it even if that involved hours of learning and trying out something new.
Saying No- If you need to get things moving this year, the one thing you need to protect is your time. So saying yes to everything also means giving away your time without adding any value to it. so, say no this year. Say no to:
Negative people
Negative vibes
Unsupportive people
Bad habits
People who bring you down
Not standing up for yourself
Apologizing for saying no
Do what you feel is positive for you, even if that means saying no for the brunch but taking the time to sip tea in the balcony and rest your day or mind. That has more value than mindless eating with people you don’t even care about.
Finding a Hobby- Hobby is the one thing that not only relaxes us, it also removes us from the stressful environment and let us be ourselves. There are numerous studies about the benefits of having a hobby.One in eight adults over 60 report some form of memory loss.This study found that adults who engaged in activities like arts and crafts, book clubs and travel were half as likely to develop mild cognitive impairment in their 80 as those who did not pursue brain-boosting hobbies.
Taking Care of your Health- Money will come, so will success but health once lost is difficult to get back. So, no matter what, ensure you are healthy and they are small things w can do to bring in the changes, if you take the right care. From better brain health, to risk reduction of chronic diseases benefits are countless. So this year focus on your health and you may also have better focus at work.
Being Present- We repeat us everyday, same routine, same things to do and sometimes we are so in automated mode that we don’t know what we had for lunch that day. Being aware or in the moment is whats suggested by so many, primarily to ensure that you are just no breezing past life. It is for you to really smell the roses, go through the experience of life and make changes along the way. Being present allows you to make conscious choices, experience the wins and losses and course correct yourself.
Inspect and Adapt- Not everything works out all the time, so the best part about life is the flexibility to readjust the route. Just because your resolution said something, doesn’t mean you have to follow it if it doesn’t make any sent to you anymore.
Flush out the Toxins- I think no matter how good your intentions, things will not work perfectly unless you can create the right environment for you. Toxins in any form, human or location should be the first to be taken care of. Once this is done and you know you can thrive, setting the right intention and following it can be life changing.
Revisiting All of the Above- Plans are made to change and they should be. So writing down all the goals might be great but visiting them often could lead you to rewrite them as situation needs to be. Also revisiting goals might be a way once of reminding what is important in your life and work towards it single mindedly.
